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I'm just trying to figure out this journey we call life

Sunday, 29 April 2012

Learning to love myself

Something I've been hearing a lot about lately is how you have to be your own best friend and love yourself how you would love a friend. Up until recently this concept was completely foreign to me, it still kind of is in many ways.

I've always struggled with the concept of being nice to yourself and liking yourself. I do believe that everyone is beautiful and I know that me believing that means that I am beautiful as well, I just struggle to believe that I'm beautiful. It's quite a hypocritical thing to say if you think about it, I preach that every person on this earth is beautiful yet can't quite apply it to me. I feel like the main reason for this is that I kind of feel as if, if someone thinks they're beautiful, they're considered big headed. It's not okay in society to think that you are pretty, that you are perfect how you are. Liking your looks is just not okay with people.

I want to like myself and love my looks, it's just not enough. I just don't know how to love my looks. I don't think I'm hideous and ugly, I just don't particularly think I look good a lot of the time. I don't want to think like that, I just do and I'm not sure how to change it.

Being your own best friend is a concept that is definitely alien to me. I've always had people in my life, always. I've always had friends, even if I didn't appreciate that I did. I don't know what it's like to be completely alone. I know what it's like to feel lonely, sure, I've felt lonely countless times in my life but I've never felt truly alone. I am so, so lucky for this. But this has meant that I haven't ever been forced to be my own best friend, I've never needed to get to know myself because I've always had people to get to know who weren't me. Hopefully, I'll always have that but now I feel like I should also make an effort to get to know me, to love me as I would a friend. Maybe then, I'll learn to love myself and find myself beautiful.

I need to change the way I view myself before I can grow any more.

This is my new journey and I'm going to try to document it on here.

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