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I'm just trying to figure out this journey we call life

Sunday 8 July 2012

Rethinking some things

Lately I've been very into thinking "I have to be happy ON MY OWN. I can't rely on ANYTHING for happiness." I've kind of had this mentality of being happy that others make me happy but also feeling like I absolutely have to make myself happy all the time without any outside influences. But now I don't know if that's the right thing for me. I don't even know if that is possible. I think people are innately influenced by other people, it's just the way we are as human beings

I know that I can be happy when I'm on my own. Walking home, noticing the little amazing things or blasting my iPod is great. I can be truly happy doing that. However, I've kind of been working on the principle that I need to be able to do that all the time and not just on the occasional times that it happens. That's not good for me because it leads to me questioning why I'm not happy all the time when I'm alone and getting frustrated with it. That just doesn't work because it makes me less happy.

People are important to me. My friends and family make me happy. They just do, and I don't want that to change. Yes, sometimes they make me happier than I make myself and I didn't think that that was okay. I thought I needed to be able to do it for myself as well as letting others do it for me. But now I don't think that's possible. I just can't be as happy on my own as I am when I'm with those who are closest to me, it's not possible but that's okay. The people in my life make my life, it's how it is. I've come to realise that this is okay and that it's natural to feel this way. I need people I love it my life and I'm glad I do.

"Nothing in the world is going to be the sole source of all your happiness...finding happiness and finding confidence is something that is an inner journey that takes a long time that probably most of us will never fully reach. I don't think that there is anyone who has ever lived who is 100% happy and confident at all times. It's a journey and you should never feel like you should have to retain happiness or retain confidence because it's a journey."
- Jaime Lyn Beatty [x]

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